Going from single to stepdad....
 
The person reaching my site from using that as a search got me to thinking. The fact that today is my one year anniversary of marrying the most caring, loving, beautiful and fun person I have ever met reminded me to stop and think about the transition from going from single to stepdad.

It isn't easy. It isn't necessarily that hard, either, you just have to accept that when you say 'I do', you not only get a wife, but also a stepchild. Sounds simple. It is, but it takes a lot of work to make it livable.

I'm lucky, I guess, since I had no children so I tend to follow my wife's lead. Sure, I don't totally agree with everything she does, but that's life. B is being raised by a Mother that completely and totally loves her, and although that's not a defense against mistakes, it is the best possible thing a child could wish for.

Trust me, sometimes B makes me mad. Sometimes I think she does it on purpose. Heck, she admits to doing things on purpose to push my buttons. But, you know what? Sometimes she does things just to be sweet to me. I came across a drawing she did for me last year. It's a picture of a football field, with a 250 foot tall Ricky Williams straddling the field. (You have to love a kid's sense of perspective, huh?) On the scoreboard is the score of the Dolphins beating the (hated by me, therefore loved by her) Patriots. She drew that for me...well, I'm not really sure why, actually. Maybe the Patriots beat the Dolphins last year and she felt bad for me? I don't know.

The point is, being a stepdad is a very cool thing. It can and will be extremely frustrating, but it is one of the most rewarding titles a man could have. You just can't beat the experience.

Teaching B to ride her bike.
Taking her to the beach and showing her how to skim board.
Explaining that those car ads that claim they will pay off your loan means they add it to the price of the new car.
Talking her into riding in the front row of a rollercoaster and at the apex of the first rise, realizing it is a really long drop, but she loves it anyway.
Spending a Sunday afternoon tossing her all over a pool.

I wouldn't give up any of those things.

So, Mr. May be a Stepdad soon, good luck.

 


  ¶ 1:34 PM